Feeling Safe and Unsafe
Today we are going to talk about the importance of not
keeping secrets about times when we feel unsafe
what comes to mind when you hear the words
‘safe’ or ‘unsafe.‘
Think about the places you are in, the people you are with, the emotions you
have, the way people speak to you, etc.
Luca’s Story
Luca is 9 years old and he lives with his mother in a very busy town. They have lived there for five years now and although Luca really likes living there, he loves going to visit his Aunt Claire and Uncle Sam who live in the
countryside. Luca loves going to Claire’s house because she lives on a farm and he really enjoys helping her and Uncle Sam to look after the animals. He can also wander for ages with his aunt and uncle in the countryside before ever coming across another house or farm. Luca always looks forward to the summer when he and his Mum go to Claire and Sam for two full weeks every
year. So when Mum suggested that Luca might like to go to Claire and Sam’s on Friday night while she went to her friend’s birthday party, Luca was delighted. He was really looking forward to spending Friday afternoon and all day Saturday on the farm. He wondered if Uncle Sam would take him out horse riding on Saturday. On Friday afternoon, Mum dropped him off to the farm and he had a great time with Uncle Sam and Aunt Claire. They walked the farm, fed all the animals and after dinner they watched a new film on DVD. By bedtime, Luca was really tired. After he got ready for bed and brushed his teeth, Luca crawled into bed in the room he usually shared with his Mum. It wasn’t long before he was fast asleep. Sometime during the night Luca woke up with a start. What was that noise he was sure he’d heard at the window? When he opened his eyes he could not believe how dark it was in the room. He couldn’t see a thing. Normally, when Mum was with him, the little night light was left on, but tonight there was no light. At home the bathroom light was always left on at night-time. Suddenly, he heard the noise again. He felt very afraid.
Luca thought that if Mum were here he could wake her up and she would make him feel safe again.
He was afraid to get out of the bed. It was so dark in the room that he couldn’t even see where the door was. Claire and Sam would be fast asleep and besides he didn’t want to act like a baby and start shouting for them to come to him. Luca couldn’t tell how long he lay there in the bed feeling very scared before he saw that the sun had begun to rise and dawn was breaking.
Even though Saturday was a beautiful day and they got to go horse riding, Luca didn’t really enjoy the day because he was so tired. When his Mum came to pick him up, Claire and Sam told her that they had loved having Luca stay over. They said he had been very good and had been no problem at all. Mum said that now that Luca was older perhaps he could come and stay for a bit longer on his own in the summer. Luca wasn’t sure he wanted to do that. What if he woke again at night time and he felt scared?
On the way home in the car Mum asked Luca about his visit to Claire and Sam’s. Luca wondered what, if anything, he should say about last night.
What do you think Luca should do?
What are the pros and cons of this scenario?
- Luca plays along and says nothing to his Mum. He will be worried if he has to go to the farm again on his own and he might worry about sleeping on his own in the pitch dark.
- Luca tells his Mum how he felt unsafe. Mum will understand how he was upset and, if Luca is going to the farm again, she will ask Claire and Sam to make sure a light is left on. Luca will be told that if it happens again, it’s ok to call out and Sam or Claire will stay with him until he feels safe.
What can we learn from Luca’s story?
Do you think it is important to tell an adult that to do something to help.
Are there other examples of a situation where you might feel unsafe and telling an adult could make a difference?
- Waking up at night-time after a bad dream
- Feeling frightened if Mum or Dad are late picking you up
- On your walk to school, there is a house with a very big dog that you are frightened of.
What could you do in these situations?
